She's growing up....

Freyja turned 8 yesterday.

I remember being 8. I felt like I was growing up faster than my friends, and a year later I started my period and pretty much decided that all those childish things were too immature.

Freyja has always held on to her childishness tightly, she hasn't wanted to grow up. This week though, for reasons we had no control over, my baby has shown just how mature she is becoming in some ways.

On Monday we found out that the victim of the truck crash last week was the Dad of one of her best friends. Lee and I had met him several times, and I have to say he was a lovely man, always smiling and joking, clearly a devoted father and husband. It was terrible finding out that the victim of that awful scene was a man we knew, and especially for Freyja, that it was her friends' Daddy.

Monday evening she cried lots, as did I. She worried about me and her Daddy dying in an accident. But mostly she worried about her friend. "How could it be her Daddy?" she asked "I just don't understand Mommy, why would God take such a nice man away from his family". "How will M manage without her Daddy? How can I make her feel better?"

So many questions that I just didn't have the answer to.

Tuesday she went to school and there was a grief counsellor there for the kids to talk to. She talked, she listened, and when they said that there should be 2 kids to meet her friend when she came back to school, Freyja put her hand up and said she had to be one of them, because they had known each other the longest and she knew her friend would need her help.

Wednesday, it was her birthday. She turned 8. She went to the Aggie Days with school. She opened presents and we all had KFC for dinner at her request. It was her day.

Thursday, today, her first thought was again for her friend. She comes back to school today. Freyja disappeared as we were about to leave the house and came back with a favourite stuffed dog. I told her stuffies weren't allowed at school.

"Its not for me" she said " Its for M. She comes back to school today and I think she will need something to hug sometimes, so this is for her to keep, so she can hug it and feel better and know I love her".

Only 8 and so grown up......

Happy Birthday Fidgetty Widget!

When I was pregnant with Freyja, my sister-in-law was expecting at the same time, and the baby who would become Charlotte was known as "Bean".  As "Bean' was no longer a family option for a nickname for our bundle to be, we started calling 'it' "Widget".  This soon became "Fidgetty Widget" as that little baby on board never kept still.  She's been the same ever since.

Today, my little tornado turns 8!  At 4.04pm GMT (9.05am here in Calgary) my little girl moves that step closer to being a woman, and I'm scared!

Its been quite a week in our house, good and also, pretty much as bad as you can get.  At the weekend, she went off to Brownie Camp.  I dropped her off Friday night, and barely managed to get her to stop chatting with her friends long enough to say goodbye to her sister and I, a sign of how grown up and independant she is getting.  When I collected her on Sunday though, I got a huge hug and "I missed you" whispered in my ear.

While she had a great time at camp, impressed the leaders with her enthusiasm and her behaviour, she also missed her family and even had a little cry at night.  While I hate that she was upset, a little part of me is happy that there is enough child in there to still miss a night time hug and kiss.

When she came home on Sunday, she told me how she had been worrying all weekend that I was going and never coming back, that something was going to happen.  Nothing did happen, of course, but my sensitive little girl was maybe picking up something in the cosmos.

On Monday, I got a call from the school asking me to collect Freyja as she was not feeling well.  I left work, went and got her, much to her surprise as she had expected her Daddy, and took her home.  She had a tummy ache that wouldn't go away, so we went through all the questions.  Did you eat your lunch?  Did you eat the fruit or just the bad stuff?  Did you eat properly at camp this weekend?  Did you drink enough water at camp?  How about at school?  Did you go to the bathroom at camp?

The answer to the last question turned out to be 'No" so I figured I had my answer and promptly ordered her to the bathroom with a book to "give it a try".  Success, but still a tummy ache that persisted.  I dutifully set her up in my bed with a glass of water and the TV remote.  I then began making phone calls to find out which of her friends was coming to her party this coming weekend as I hadn't had RSVPs.  "I don't think M is coming" she says as I'm about to call.  I make the call and her Grandma answers, not her Mom, and sure enough M isn't coming.  I tell her she was right.  "I thought she wouldn't because K said today that M's Dad died in a truck accident last week"

Oh My God !!!!!!

There had been a horrific accident involving a tractor trailer on the main route near our home the week before, but it was Easter week, the kids were off school, I hadn't had a chance to read the details and Monday had been their first day back.  I got out my phone, Googled his name, and there it was, an obituary and the date of the crash......

Now I knew why my baby had a tummy ache.  She had been holding that to herself all afternoon, not knowing what to say, or if it was true.  We knew M's dad.  Not well, but enough that he and M's Mom had once come to our house and had food before we all set out Trick or Treating together one Halloween.  We'd see him at school dances and Christmas shows and chat. He was a truly nice, good man, and a wonderful father and husband.

All Monday night, Freyja would ask for hugs and squeeze tightly, she didn't want to go to bed, but finally, after an hour of cajolling, she did and amazingly she slept soundly for a few hours, not waking until around 2am.  I lay with her another hour then, and I am not sure who needed it more, me or her.  She fell asleep again, and slept till morning, waking in that resiliant way that kids do after bad news. 

She went to school Tuesday and I called to tell them we knew what had happened and was told a grief counsellor was going to be with her class that morning.  I wish I'd had one myself as I was a wreck.  We weren't close, but I knew him, I knew the horrible way his life had ended, I knew the confusion and sadness I was feeling were the same feelings my poor girl had, and like me, she was likely imagining "what if it had been her Daddy".

My big girl came home yesterday without mentioning her friend or the grief counsellor, so I mentioned it to her. "Yes" she said "it helped to talk about it. M is coming back to school on Thursday and they said two of her friends should be close to her all the time and go to meet her at the door.  I told them I should be one of them as I have known her longer than anyone, and I knew her Daddy, so I think I will be able to be a good friend and help her feel better."

Only 8 today, off to 'Aggie Days' with the school to see the animals, she will be a kid having fun again, but tomorrow, she will be that mature girl, the shoulder to support her friend.  Saturday, she will be the kid again, enjoying her party, but I know part of her will be thinking about the friend who isn't there, the friend who is at home missing her Daddy. 

My baby isn't a baby any more.  She has kept telling me she didn't want to grow up, and I kept telling her it happens to everyone, but I thought the biggest thing threatening to bring the end of childhood would be the onset of puberty....  I never thought my girl would have to deal with such big issues so soon in life, and I am so proud of how strong she is being, and how her first and continuing thought is how she can make her friend feel better, feel happy, even if just for a moment. 

What a wonderful person she is growing up to be, my sweet, kind, loving, feisty, argumentative, creative, all singing, all dancing, Fidgetty Widget xxx

The to-do with To Do lists....

So, I suddenly had a thought today, "I wonder how long I have left to complete that To Do list I posted on her, way back when.  Seems the deadline passed 2 weeks ago, so lets see how I did shall we? (cough, not that well!!)

 

First off, there were 55 things, rather than 50.  And its been 516 days...

 

That should average out at one thing off the list every 9.38 days (thank you trusty calculator!)

 

The list is reposted below and frankly is a sad testament to the ways 'life' gets in the way of, well, 'life'!

 

Red = not done

Orange = started and abandoned half way for no reason other than I am a lazy arse, frantically busy working mom of 2....

Green = done

 

 

By my calculations, they add up to the following

 

Red = 27 (49%)

Orange = 15 (27%)

Green = 13 (24%)

 

So I did only a quarter of things on the list, but I did get another quarter underway.  Half have gone untouched and I notice that most of them are to do with eating habits and fitness (old habits die hard I suppose).

 

Most of the items related to the kids though, are either started or done, as are many of the things around the home.

 

So, I suppose this highlights that I spend more time and energy on my family, kids and home, and less time on me and my health.  Good in some ways. bad in others.

 

So lets see.... it's September 25 today, my 8th wedding anniversary tomorrow, so lets have the anniversary as the new start date and New Years Eve as the end date.  Gives me 97 days to see how many more I can either get underway or completed.

 

Here's hoping....

 

 

 

50 Things to Do in 500 Days
Start: April 27th, 2011
Finish: September 7th, 2012

Projects
1. Paint Dining Table and Chairs
2. Sew and repair all items in the sewing basket that have now been waiting over a year!
3. Paint Playroom with Mural
4. Scan old photos and put some on Facebook
5. Put all photos into new albums and only keep the good ones!
6. Finish embroidery on Sparks bag for Freyja
7. Make personalised crossstitch item for both girls in time for Christmas 2011 FAIL!!!!

Kids

8. Finish Baby Book for Freyja (now 6 years old)

9. Get Baby Book up to date for Rosie
10. Create Family Tree for kids
11. Finish 1st Year Photos for Rosie
12. Make a Fairy house for the girls in the garden
13. Spend a Mom day with Freyja getting hair done / Nails done without baby coming too.
14. Volunteer for a day (maybe Thanksgiving) with Freyja to teach her how fortunate she is.

Health & Fitness

15. Get weight down below 170 lbs (Was over 200 when I went in to have Rosie)
16. Run a 5K - Signed up for May 8th!

17. Run a 10K - August or November depending on how long it takes to get fitness level up.18. Incorporate fruit or vegetables into Lunch and Dinner every day for 2 weeks to get into the habit - hopefully then I'll keep doing it.

19. Don't eat chocolate or ice cream for a month (now this one will be hard!)

20. Get up to running 2 km instead of just walking and alternate running and walking up to 10km

21. Take a Belly Dancing or Pole Dancing class

Family

22. Go on a family vacation (at least twice/yr.)

23. Take a spontaneous weekend trip to somewhere close
24. Get family pictures taken

25. Go on a picnic.
26. Go on a nature trail with kids.

Personal

27. Write in Blog at least once a week.

28. Put together a photo collage for both sets of parents and my grandparents of me, DH and the girls
29. Write a letter to my Dad (He's been waiting a long time for this)
30. Write a short childrens story for the girls
31. Finish reading "Pride & Prejudice & Zombies"
32. Finish the Dragon crossstitch I started when I was 19 (I am now 35 and it will only take a few hours to finish)
33. Get dragon cross stitch framed and put up with pride of place.
34. Take a cooking or painting class.
35. Make a will and set up what would happen to kids in W.C.S.
36. Write a letter or make a video for kids for them to have of me if anything happened.

Finance

37. Save some money for a visit back to the UK next year.

38. Save to RESP's for girls (Now set up finally!)

39. Set up RRSP's for me and DH.

Home & Organization
40. Clean oven every 2 weeks so it doesn't get so horrible

41. Set up Chore Chart for me, DH and Freyja so everyone does something to keep on top of things
42. Organize Playroom
43. Organize Office Space and get rid of stuff that really is not needed
44. Organize closet and get rid of big clothes so I can't 'grow' back into them.
45. Go through memory boxes and condense them down before they take over the house.
46. Have a Garden Chore chart for the summer / fall
47. Plant seeds for flowers and veggies and grow garden with Freyja
48. Go through house and get rid of EVERYTHING we don't use - if you don't ever use it, you don't need it!

Food

49. Get a Box freezer for the basement

50. Create a 2 week meal planner and use it to shop and cook
51. Create a batch of freezer meals
52. Use herbs and veggies from our own garden and MAKE SURE THEY DON"T DIE!

53. Cut out as much processed food as possible

54. Retrain Freyja to eat without the use of Alphagetti, Chicken Nuggets or Ketchup (again this one may prove impossible)

55. Cook a new recipe each week from one of the many cook books we have.

It's been how long!!

Ok, it would seem I have been getting a little lax in my posting. In my defence, I have been taking this day by day with what has been happening with Freyja, and really that, in many ways, defines my life right now.

We have our diagnosis of ADHD, and each day we work around how she is behaving (or not) and figure out how best to do things.

We are still doing the usual stuff, and we have had some lovely (busy) days lately.

Freyja turned 7 years old in April and had a beach party. It was an indoor beach party, in our house, as her birthday is at the beginning of April, and usually that means snow in Calgary, though this year, it was actually quite sunny until the afternoon, with no snow on the ground.

I gave them a bit more free range this year, but maybe I should have kept it more structured, as I think they were wondering what to do for a bit. They had a kids inflatable pool filled with balls instead of water, played a game of marco polo round the living room, and invented their own version of beach volley ball with the beach ball, and later balloons. I got them all a craft to do, a suncatcher which they each painted, though half of them forgot it and I still have them at home, and of course there were the presents and cake.

I have some pictures, but as the girls were all dressed in swimsuits and bikinis, I won't be posting them on here, but there are some pictures of the food and the cake I made!

Not a bad cake considering that the morning of her party she changed her mind about how she wanted it decorated!

May brought us Rosie's second birthday, just a few family friends, but a lovely day nonetheless. It's amazing to see how much she has grown and what a little individual she is already. Freyja was a fab big sister and helped her open up all the presents, then handed out cake to everyone. It's great to see her developing as a big sister.

June was a month of many changes. School ended and summer began. It was also the end of Sparks and the end of routine. Freyja got a fantastic report, which was a boost for all of us. It's been a busy few months, and a hard few months but we are beginning to find our way now, at least I hope so.

I go into more detail about the day to day struggles in my other blog, but the short version is that in April and May we tried a medication and the side effects were awful. It was, bluntly, two months of Hell. We were all at breaking point. We decided to stop it, had two weeks meds free and realized that wasn't working either, so we started on new meds. Three weeks in and things are going pretty good. There are good days and not so good, but none of the extreme stuff. The late nights and lack of structure that summer brings probably doesn't help, but who doesn't struggle to get their 7 year old to bed when the nights are light and the neighborhood kids are still out playing.

For now we will take it day by day and look forward to our vacation and the new school year ahead and all it brings.

Halloween, Sparks camp and such

Well, here we are about to embark on December and we woke up to snow this morning.  Surprisingly, we haven't had much of the white stuff in October and November, so the activities mentioned in this post took place in relative comfort and little snow (even if it was a bit chilly) - a nice change from the usual Calgary weather.

So first we had Halloween.  Now Freyja had many outfits this year - a witch for the Sparks trip to the Corn Maze, a cat for the school party, a zombie for the Sparks party and a poodle for Halloween itself (have I mentioned she is going to grow up 'High Maintenance'?).  The cat and the zombie were her costumes from last year and the year before which I had made roomy in the hope they would last a few years - good decision!  This years poodle ourfit really just consisted of some pink pants and a pink woolly sweater to keep her warm out on the cold streets, along with some ears, tail and poofy poodly bits fashioned from socks, pink bath scrunchies and wire coat hangers (I grew up watching Blue Peter in the UK - you can make anything out of nothing if you really try!!)  I think she looks darned cute - what do you think?

 

I made a bit of an effort this year at decorating the yard for Halloween, though still trying not to spend much cash.  Our old moving boxes got turned into grave stones, and all in all looked fairly spooky for the kids coming round trick or treating.  The one eyed alien pumpkin was Freyja's design - we even made it so it was eating a baby pumpkin!

Rosie was just a little baby at Halloween last year, and though she went out with us this year, I don't think she was old enough yet to appreciate it.  She was still in her stroller, and rather cold, and really did not like being in her unicorn outfit, so sadly no pictures of her - but she did seem happy when she got home.  

Just after Halloween was Sparks camp.  Last year Freyja had a great time off for the weekend with the girls in her troupe.  This year it was a Moms and Daughters weekend.  Now I have not slept in a dormitory with other people since school so it was a bit of an experience, but it was much needed time for Freyja and I to reconnect and have time without her little sister being there.  Freyja has been a bit difficult due to jealousy and this really seemed to help her understand that I do still love her, she just has to share my time.  The picture here is her Sparks leader "Angel' surrounded by some of the girls, shortly before they tackled her to the floor with no mercy - They are a rough lot these Sparks!

Rosie was left with Lee for the weekend, and they needed time alone together just as much as Freyja and I.  Rosie has always been quite clingy to me, but she had a great time with Lee and has been a changed girl for him.  She lets him do bed time without a fuss, I can leave the house without it being the end of the world, and best yet, we had a night out and she didn't send the babysitter demented!!

The night out was for Lee's work Christmas party.  I bought a 1950's style dress, so thought I would do my hair and make up in a similar pin-up way.  We have my christmas work party this weekend so I can try to get the look better for that (the dress was costly by my standards so I want to get maximum use from it this season!)    Sadly, the party took place as I was getting better from 2 weeks of being off work sick with a chest infection that set off an asthma reaction, so I didn't really do anything of any interest in those weeks, just a lot of sofa time!

And as an end, I will leave you with a couple more very cute pictures of my lovely girls!

Holy Brrrr Batman!! It's cold out there!

In the 5 weeks or so since my last post (I know, I know, I'm crap aren't I!!) it has changed from sunny days at the waterpark to chill winds and autumn colours.  Yes, it is officially Autumn / Fall in Calgary.

My tree looked beautiful yesterday morning, all reds, golds and oranges. 

By last night, it was naked, almost embarrassed looking!  My fake cobwebs, lovingly and perfectly draped by Freyja about the tree and shrubbery acted as a magnet to all the falling leaves and now look like some abstract art installation piece - not exactly scary for Halloween.

And what has happened in the last 5 weeks you may ask!  Well, on a global scale, much of the same, economic crisis, political crisis and still no apparent world peace (much to the upset of Beauty Queens everywhere) but on a more personal scale, quite a lot has occurred.

     Firstly, we had a return to school by my eldest daughter.  This was quite momentous for us, as she had her Kindergarten year in a different school doing French immersion, and it wasn't really working out as we had hoped.  This year, she is attending a school just 5 minutes walk from our house, and the dayhome we use is just over the school field, so in the morning I drop Freyja and Rosie at the dayhome, with the fabulous Margie who they both love, and then Freyja walks across to the school with another of the dayhome kids.  Her dayhome friend, N,  also has a little brother, D,  at the dayhome who stays there with Rosie through the day.

The change has been great.  Last year, she would come home from school and not remember a thing she had done all day - this year you can't shut her up about what she has done / learned.  Last year she didn't really like her teacher, this year her new teacher is the best in the world (Thank you Mrs V!)  and her reading skills are just coming on in leaps and bounds, as is her confidence and her ability to make new friends.

She went back to Sparks too, and joined Musical Theatre classes.  As a bonus, one of her Sparks friends is in her Grade 1 class and her Musical Theatre class.  They are now great buddies and all set for a sleep over at our house this weekend.

Talking of sleepovers and Sparks, Freyja and I are off to the Mother/Daughter camp in 10 days!  Lee is having Rosie at home, and it will be his first time overnight with her - actually right through the weekend!  She is such a mamma's girl and forever pushing away Lee, so I think this weekend is going to be just what we all need.  Rosie needs some time with Daddy so she can realise that he can kiss those booboo's better too, and Daddy needs to have Rosie time, poor thing hasn't had much of a look in so far.

The other thing about the sleepover is that Freyja will get my attention for 2 whole days with no baby sister to interrupt.  Her behaviour with me (and only me) has been getting progressively worse and its pretty much all down to jealousy I think.  This weekend is going to be a big help to that I hope.

My other big thing is that I am now officially an Avon lady!  I have been wanting to start my own business in some way for a long time but didn't have the money to do it.  Avon allows me to try it out and see if I can juggle two kids, activities and a full time job, and still get my chores done as well as the business.  So far, the Avon is doing OK, as I build up my customer base, but the chores are falling by the wayside.  Lee is doing his share and more and I feel like I am getting nothing done and am spreading myself just a little too thin.  Other mothers manage all this, so why can't I???  I am hoping that with a bit of practice, it will all come together, as any extra money I make would be very helpful (I need to pay for my citizenship application!) but if it ends up being too much, I know what has to give.

Today is the financial year end at work, normally my busiest day of the year, but rather than leaving it to the last minute as usual, this year we have been more proactive and the counting has been done over and over this last month, to the point where pretty much all discrepancies were cleared up.  As a consequence, I am sitting here at work with nothing better to do than balance the payroll hours, and update this blog......  I am getting fidgety though - there has to be something to correct surely!!

Last night was Freyja's first school dance (for Halloween - now only a few days away), and she also lost her first (and second) tooth this month.  Her adult ones are in already - no unsightly gaps for her (apart from the gap she has had since she knocked the top tooth out a week before her third birthday!!  That will be a gap for a good time yet apparently!) 

This has all been about Freyja, so what about Rosie......

She changes so much ever day, it's easy not to even notice, until one day you look and your baby isn't a baby any more.

She's 18 months old, and although she still isn't really talking (just 3 or 4 words that you have to already know what she's saying to understand) she sure understands us.  Give her some instructions and away she goes (maybe her big sister could learn some pointers there!)  She's bright and inquisitive and becoming very independent.

I'm not allowed to even try to feed her any more, if it can't be eaten independently, the it won't be eaten.

And she's all for trying out new things - in the manner of all children, sometimes the box is better than the toy that came in it too!

She loves anything and everything Dora, and will scream herself hoarse from the moment she is strapped in the van until the moment I start the engine so the DVD player comes on... Dora, Dora, Dora the Explorer..... Boots and super cool Explorer Dora!!

But most of all, she loves her sister.  Freyja doesn't yet understand how much, but my little independent girl is trying so hard to be just like my big little independent girl.  They are so alike in so many ways, and yet, at the same time, so individual. 


Oh, and one last thing has happened since my last post....

I completed the Run for the Cure.  5km in just under 45 minutes.  I was very proud to reach my goal, and even prouder to have taken part and have my family there to cheer me on, so here are a few pictures of that to finish off!

 

Update on the TO DO list...

I could probably be doing a bit better on this so maybe looking at this may spur me on...

Projects
1. Paint Dining Table and Chairs
2. Sew and repair all items in the sewing basket that have now been waiting over a year!
3. Paint Playroom with Mural
4. Scan old photos and put some on Facebook (started this one, but we have several hundred photos, so this could take some time!)
5. Put all photos into new albums and only keep the good ones! Started on this too but have so many photos I think it will take the full 500 days!!
6. Finish embroidery on Sparks bag for Freyja - DONE!!  Yay!
7. Make personalised crossstitch item for both girls in time for christmas 2011  their next birthdays - amended this one as I have decided what to make them and would rather personalise them for their birthday gift.

Kids

8. Finish Baby Book for Freyja (now 6 years old)

9. Get Baby Book up to date for Rosie

10. Create Family Tree for kids - DONE but ongoing as we find out more info.

11. Finish 1st Year Photos for Rosie

12. Make a Fairy house for the girls in the garden

13. Spend a Mom day with Freyja getting hair done / Nails done without baby coming too. We did spend a day, just us at the Childrens Festival, but I think I'll keep this on the list to have a real girlie day.
14. Volunteer for a day (maybe Thanksgiving) with Freyja to teach her how fortunate she is.

Health & Fitness

15. Get weight down below 170 lbs (Was over 200 when I went in to have Rosie)  - OH DEAR!!!
16. Run a 5K - Signed up for May 8th! - DONE!

17. Run a 10K - August or November depending on how long it takes to get fitness level up.
18. Incorporate fruit or vegetables into Lunch and Dinner every day for 2 weeks to get into the habit - hopefully then I'll keep doing it.

19. Don't eat chocolate or ice cream for a month (now this one will be hard!)

20. Get up to running 2 km instead of just walking and alternate running and walking up to 10km

21. Take a Belly Dancing or Pole Dancing class

Family

22. Go on a family vacation (at least twice/yr.)

23. Take a spontaneous weekend trip to somewhere close - We went camping with the people from work for a weekend and are off in a couple of weeks for another camping trip.
24. Get family pictures taken

25. Go on a picnic. We did this with our trip out to Johnson Lake near Banff
26. Go on a nature trail with kids.

Personal

27. Write in Blog at least once a week. Trying hard to do this now

28. Put together a photo collage for both sets of parents and my grandparents of me, DH and the girls
29. Write a letter to my Dad (He's been waiting a long time for this) Done!!!! Yay - only took 4 years!!

30. Write a short childrens story for the girls

31. Finish reading "Pride & Prejudice & Zombies"  DONE!
32. Finish the Dragon crossstitch I started when I was 19 (I am now 36 and it will only take a few hours to finish)
33. Get dragon cross stitch framed and put up with pride of place.

34. Take a cooking or painting class.

35. Make a will and set up what would happen to kids in W.C.S. - Underway

36. Write a letter or make a video for kids for them to have of me if anything happened.

Finance

37. Save some money for a visit back to the UK next year.

38. Save to RESP's for girls (Now set up finally!) I suppose I can consider this done as they are now set up and the saving has begun - just need to up the amount next year when we have a bit more cash on hand.

39. Set up RRSP's for me and DH.
 

Home & Organization
40. Clean oven every 2 weeks so it doesn't get so horrible

41. Set up Chore Chart for me, DH and Freyja so everyone does something to keep on top of things

42. Organize Playroom Done

43. Organize Office Space and get rid of stuff that really is not needed

44. Organize closet and get rid of big clothes so I can't 'grow' back into them. Done some but still have a few more things to get rid of

45. Go through memory boxes and condense them down before they take over the house.

46. Have a Garden Chore chart for the summer / fall
47. Plant seeds for flowers and veggies and grow garden with Freyja

48. Go through house and get rid of EVERYTHING we don't use - if you don't ever use it, you don't need it!

Food

49. Get a Box freezer for the basement

50. Create a 2 week meal planner and use it to shop and cook
51. Create a batch of freezer meals
52. Use herbs and veggies from our own garden and MAKE SURE THEY DON"T DIE!

53. Cut out as much processed food as possible

54. Retrain Freyja to eat without the use of Alphagetti, Chicken Nuggets or Ketchup (again this one may prove impossible)

55. Cook a new recipe each week from one of the many cook books we have.

Stop being a crazy lady and pull it together!!

That's what I've told myself, and that's what I've done.

I am no longer feeling like The End of (My) World is Nigh!  Actually, I'm feeling pretty good.

I got my blood tests done yesterday and my ultrasounds are in the morning.  Someone I know mentioned the symptoms I had sounded like Endometriosis, so, yes, I went back to the dreaded Internet, but with an actual affliction in mind you get so much more reliable results.  Looking at the symptoms, I think my friend was bang on in her diagnosis.  It sounds like symptoms I've been having since I was a teen, just that they have gotten progressively worse until I am at this point and in pain most days.  The thing is, whilst it's painful, and damned annoying, it is in no way life threatening.  So, while the Doc still needs to do his diagnosis and agree with this, I am feeling in a more positive frame of mind, because it is something I can again have control over.

Because of my little panic, and my current sunnier mindset, I have been reminded of just how much I adore my darling hubby and our beautiful daughters, and consequently I have been making the most of my spare time with the kids.  The house perpetually looks like a bomb site (hopefully no visitors will come!) but I had a lovely weekend at the splash park on Saturday and a classic car show on Sunday with my girls.  Fun was had and quality time was spent.  Monday, Freyja wanted to head to the park in the evening.  Usually I am full of excuses, it's too hot, too cold, too windy, too rainy, too late etc.  But Monday, I moved my lazy arse, and off we went.  It was lovely!  Sure, my own personal ground zero awaited me at home (it still does incidentally) but hell, there are always more dishes to clean, clothes to wash, floors to sweep, but how many precious moments of childhood are there remaining.  They tick by so fast, we need to grab them with both hands, capture memories on film and enjoy each precious second.... And then embarrass them with the photographic evidence when they are teenagers!!! :-)

Here comes the rain again....

Well Annie Lennox is originally from Scotland, land of mist and midges (thats like a mini mosquito if you didn't know) and most of all, rain!  Actually, anywhere in the UK is pretty much a land of rain.  If you get a dry day back there it is cause for celebration, 2 in a row and people start complaining about a heatwave!

So, it was actually with some enthusiasm that I greeted the rain just over a week ago, on the sunday of our long weekend.  I kept up the enthusiasm, to some degree, for a few days, but looking at the clouds outside now, after having endured a week of rain and only 2 days of sun following it, I will happily say "rain, rain, go away".

Being British, you get used to doing "stuff" in the rain.  Shopping, Dog walking, Hiking, Camping, Outdoor sports and any places you visit are almost always accompanied by a 'drizzle', 'spitting' 'shower' or more often than not 'downpour'.  The words "It's pissing down again" are not uncommon in the Island Nation of Brittania, believe me.

In the stalwart British manner therefore, on Thursday Freyja and I set off for Downtown Calgary and the Children`s Festival in the pouring rain - possibly the worst rain of the whole week.  She was away at Sparks camp at the weekend, and the school was taking her to the festival on the Friday, so I decided to make a long weekend of fun for her, kept her off school, took the baby to the dayhome as normal and off we went.  It was a lovely day for both of us.  It is so rare to have any time for just us two.  She gets time with her dad every weekend when he takes her to her dance class, but I almost always have a baby attached, limpet like, to some part of my body, and poor daughter #1 gets left out a bit.

It was fun.  We had icecream, we made clay art, we had our faces painted and made a comic book together, she narrated, I drew it (I use the term drew very loosely) and then she coloured it in.  We were rained on constantly and the ground beneath our feet splashed and slurped with each step (anyone who has been to a music festival or camping in the UK will be very familiar with this).  We went for McDonalds and 'sat-in' (we always get it take out and she always wants to sit in).  It was great!!  Then in the car on the way home, it started.... the arguing, the whining, the generally being a turd!!  At bed time, when it escalated again, I asked her why she was acting that way after such a lovely day out (cue face like Puss in Boots off Shrek) "I wanted it to be just us all the way to bed time but you went and got Rosie back!"  Awww!  It's hard to be angry when given that as a reason.

So, now the baby is a bit happier being left with her dad, dayhome etc, maybe Freyja and I can schedule in some more girl time outside the house, just the two of us, and maybe that will help bring my smiley girl back.

So how is that To Do list coming along???

Well it is a full month since I made my list, and the first thing I have realised is that it is not a list of 50 things, its 55 things.  Maybe I should add number 56.  Learn to count....

And so, I am going to cut and paste this to the top at the beginning of every month so I can log what I have actually done and not forget about it.

So here we have the updates for month # 1 - Not too bad if I say so myself.

Projects
1. Paint Dining Table and Chairs
2. Sew and repair all items in the sewing basket that have now been waiting over a year!
3. Paint Playroom with Mural
4. Scan old photos and put some on Facebook
5. Put all photos into new albums and only keep the good ones!  Started on this but have so many photos I think it will take the full 500 days!!
6. Finish embroidery on Sparks bag for Freyja
7. Make personalised crossstitch item for both girls in time for christmas 2011

Kids

8. Finish Baby Book for Freyja (now 6 years old)

9. Get Baby Book up to date for Rosie

10. Create Family Tree for kids

11. Finish 1st Year Photos for Rosie

12. Make a Fairy house for the girls in the garden

13. Spend a Mom day with Freyja getting hair done / Nails done without baby coming too.  We did spend a day, just us at the Childrens Festival, but I think I'll keep this on the list to have a real girlie day.
14. Volunteer for a day (maybe Thanksgiving) with Freyja to teach her how fortunate she is.

Health & Fitness

15. Get weight down below 170 lbs (Was over 200 when I went in to have Rosie)

16. Run a 5K - Signed up for May 8th! Well, didn't run exactly, walked it with hubbie.  He pulled F.H. in the wagon and I pushed L.R. in the stroller.  Because of that we had to be in the stroller bit and its difficult to pick up much speed there.  Did it in an hour though so not too bad considering.

17. Run a 10K - August or November depending on how long it takes to get fitness level up.
18. Incorporate fruit or vegetables into Lunch and Dinner every day for 2 weeks to get into the habit - hopefully then I'll keep doing it. 

19. Don't eat chocolate or ice cream for a month (now this one will be hard!)

20. Get up to running 2 km instead of just walking and alternate running and walking up to 10km

21. Take a Belly Dancing or Pole Dancing class

Family

22. Go on a family vacation (at least twice/yr.)

23. Take a spontaneous weekend trip to somewhere close
24. Get family pictures taken

25. Go on a picnic.   We did this with our trip out to Johnson Lake near Banff.
26. Go on a nature trail with kids.

Personal

27. Write in Blog at least once a week.  Trying hard to do this now

28. Put together a photo collage for both sets of parents and my grandparents of me, DH and the girls
29. Write a letter to my Dad (He's been waiting a long time for this)  Done!!!!  Yay - only took 4 years!!

30. Write a short childrens story for the girls

31. Finish reading "Pride & Prejudice & Zombies"  Still reading
32. Finish the Dragon crossstitch I started when I was 19 (I am now 35 and it will only take a few hours to finish)
33. Get dragon cross stitch framed and put up with pride of place.

34. Take a cooking or painting class.

35. Make a will and set up what would happen to kids in W.C.S.

36. Write a letter or make a video for kids for them to have of me if anything happened.

Finance

37. Save some money for a visit back to the UK next year.

38. Save to RESP's for girls (Now set up finally!)  I suppose I can consider this done as they are now set up and the saving has begun - just need to up the amount next year when we have a bit more cash on hand.

39. Set up RRSP's for me and DH.
 

Home & Organization
40. Clean oven every 2 weeks so it doesn't get so horrible

41. Set up Chore Chart for me, DH and Freyja so everyone does something to keep on top of things

42. Organize Playroom  Done

43. Organize Office Space and get rid of stuff that really is not needed

44. Organize closet and get rid of big clothes so I can't 'grow' back into them.  Done some but still have a few more things to get rid of

45. Go through memory boxes and condense them down before they take over the house.

46. Have a Garden Chore chart for the summer / fall
47. Plant seeds for flowers and veggies and grow garden with Freyja

48. Go through house and get rid of EVERYTHING we don't use  - if you don't ever use it, you don't need it!

Food

49. Get a Box freezer for the basement

50. Create a 2 week meal planner and use it to shop and cook
51. Create a batch of freezer meals
52. Use herbs and veggies from our own garden and MAKE SURE THEY DON"T DIE!

53. Cut out as much processed food as possible

54. Retrain Freyja to eat without the use of Alphagetti, Chicken Nuggets or Ketchup (again this one may prove impossible)

55. Cook a new recipe each week from one of the many cook books we have.